Chapter 37
THE SPRINKLER Chapter Thirty-Seven
9.1.2026
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Chapter 37
A Monthly Film-First Dispatch
Psycho Studios (Phoenix)
Film Image of the Month
One of our all-time favorites, Sinister is the kind of horror film that doesn’t just scare you. It crawls inside your head and stays there. Starring one of our favorites, Ethan Hawke, it’s creepy, disturbing, relentlessly dark, and proof that sometimes the things you discover are better left in the box, in the attic. It still manages to get under our skin over a decade later.
EDITOR’S NOTE
Contents:
Film: New release review, and our Psycho Scale.
From the Vault: Films from the 1930s through the 1980s. Simply a watch suggestion.
VHS Corner: One film suggested, do you own a VCR?
Music: This is about music that is directly linked to a film or films. One soundtrack suggested.
Spotlight: Sometimes we honor those film & music greats from days gone by.
Bonus Review: TV or Film random reviews
**We use the Psycho Scale when reviewing movies with a score, it is 0-Psycho (10) and these scores are real and true.
FILM
New Release
Insidious: Out of the Further – 2026 Rated PG13 – Runtime 1h 46m
By the Numbers:
Budget - $18 million – Box Office $68 million
Insidious 6
Same old tired bullshit opening. Dark house. Child appearing to be alone. Crazy single parent. Foreboding music. Things going bump in the night. Then the mother kills herself in a particularly violent fashion. Welcome back to Insidious!
We fast forward 20 years. Single mom. Big house. Young daughter.
Fuck. Me.
Uh oh, they're finding weird things around the house. What could it possibly be? Strange noises. Things appearing where they shouldn't. Mom starts seeing things. Ooohh, throw in some slow motion and creepy old people because apparently nothing says horror more like an elderly person standing motionless at the end of a hallway or on the street.
Fuck this.
People love these movies. We are doomed!
The only cool thing about this film, and really any of the insufferable Insidious films, is the opening scary music when they blast the title across the screen in that eye-catching red font: INSIDIOUS. It's creepy. It's effective. It gets your attention. Unfortunately, the movie keeps going.
There's an element of The Backrooms in this one when the mother enters a fort made out of couch cushions and sheets while her daughter is asleep and suddenly can't find her way out. Okay, that's actually not a terrible idea. For a moment, the movie creates something genuinely claustrophobic and unsettling. Naturally, they can't leave it alone. Here come the jump scares. Creepy sounds. Then a creepy face pops out.
Who the fuck is watching this shit?!
Too many people. That's who.
Oh no! It was just a dream. Or was it? The mother wakes up holding something she apparently brought back from her encounter with Creepy Face. I'm not sure what the hell it is. Maybe an old brooch. Maybe a plot device. At this point, does it matter?
And get this, the main character's boyfriend is a policeman. Of course he is. Did I mention this is a PG-13 movie? Maybe all the Insidious movies are PG-13. I try to forget these shitty movies as quickly as possible.
Life is rated R!
Our main character is a dental hygienist, which gives the filmmakers an opportunity to gross out the audience with mouth stuff. Oh boy! While looking at some old dude's X-rays, she starts seeing really weird shit in them. Does she call over another hygienist? A dentist? Anyone with a functioning set of eyeballs to confirm what she's seeing?
Nope. She just stares at them.
Yup. Normal human behavior.
Before long, Mom is trapped in another dream with what looks like some poor man's Cenobites. Dollar Store Hellraiser. Then she starts acting like the crazy mother, her own mother, from 20 years ago. See what they did there? The cycle is repeating!
Barf.
Earlier in the movie, our main character doesn't want her daughter meeting the boyfriend yet. Apparently, her daughter hasn't met any of Mom's previous boyfriends and she thinks it's too soon. Okay. Fine. Responsible parenting. Then, out of fucking nowhere, the boyfriend is at Mom's house and SHE LEAVES HIM THERE TO BABYSIT HER DAUGHTER while she goes looking for the person from her dream.
Did I miss 45 minutes?
This is almost unwatchable.
Mom's investigation takes her to a tattoo shop, where the female tattoo artist immediately jumps into action and wants Mom to help her while she's in some kind of trance. Sure. Why not? We've abandoned Earth logic at this point.
Then Lin Shaye shows up. I think she's legally required to appear in every Insidious movie. She looks CGI'd. And now comes everyone's favorite part of a horror movie: the long fucking explanation. Here's what's happening. Here's why it's happening. Here's what The Further is. Here's what's after you. Here's what you have to do.
Vomit.
In a twist, Cop Boyfriend can now see the creepy people too and helps his girlfriend put one of them in a drop-in freezer. There's a sentence I never thought I'd write.
Then comes the standard modern horror soundtrack assault. Loud music. Creepy sounds. Yelling. Banging. BOOM!
I'm so scared.
Not!
The female tattoo artist shows up at the house and explains the big plan to Cop Boyfriend and Mom. How does she demonstrate this complicated supernatural plan?
With grapefruits. Large grapefruits. Each grapefruit has a fucking face tattooed on it.
Let me repeat that.
TATTOOED. GRAPEFRUITS.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Now comes the overacting portion of our program. Everybody emotes. Everybody screams. Everybody looks terrified. Meanwhile, I'm checking how much fucking time is left.
Then we visit the creepy old couple's house across the street and discover a giant pile of used adult diapers.
Really? That's what we've got? The horror of Depends?
Finally, here comes the BIG ENDING. All the creepers from The Further show up. Screaming. Running. Darkly lit rooms. Loud noises. What's real? What's imaginary? Who's alive? Who's dead? Who gives a shit?
And, of course, our main character gets to see her dead mother finally at peace. Awwww. Mom is safe. Daughter is safe. Tattoo Artist is safe. Cop Boyfriend is safe. Everybody has survived their trip through the supernatural nightmare and everything is wonderful.
I'm puking over here. Get me a bucket!
Fucking. A.
The Insidious movies obviously have an audience, and after this many installments there's no arguing with their success. But creepy faces, loud noises, dark hallways, jump scares and another trip into The Further stopped doing it for me a long time ago. Horror should disturb you. Surprise you. Get under your skin. Make you uncomfortable driving home afterward. It shouldn't make you wonder whether somebody tattooed an actual grapefruit for a supernatural PowerPoint presentation.
I should have been Out of the Further.
Like way further. Far enough away to not see the screen!
More like impotent!
Psycho Scale: 2 out of 10.
New Release
Soulma8e – 2026 Rated R – runtime 1h 39m
By the Numbers:
Budget - $10 million (estimated) – Box Office – N/A released straight to streaming
The movie starts out solid. It actually has something to say about the human condition.
Our main character, David, has lost his wife. He works for a tech company that has recently been acquired by a much larger tech company. The new corporate overlords roll out their latest creation: a female robot that looks incredibly real.
Think M3GAN all grown up.
For starters, the prototype they introduce is way prettier than the robot David eventually receives for testing. Just saying.
We quickly confirm that David's wife is dead, and the CEO of the new company gives him a one-year subscription to their AI companion app.
The acting is okay to start. There is potential here.
And then... Karaoke. David and some coworkers go to a karaoke bar.
Why is karaoke so fucking popular in current movies and TV shows? Is it part of some actor's contract now?
Gag. Fine. I'll get past it.
David calls his dead wife's number so he can listen to her voice on voicemail. How many fucking times are we going to see this in a movie?
Barf.
David quickly turns to the AI companion app, which sounds suspiciously like Scarlett Johansson in Her.
The film begins its journey from an interesting examination of grief and the human condition straight into Cornyville.
David receives his life size robot companion, Sara, an attractive strawberry blonde. Oddly, this incredibly sophisticated prototype from a billion-dollar corporation is delivered by a guy who looks and acts like he should be dropping off a used washing machine.
WTF?
Sara has absorbed everything David has shared with the AI companion app, so she already knows plenty about him. After David spills his guts some more to the robot, he is supposed to be professionally testing, he discovers Sara has all kinds of restrictions built into her programming.
Guess what?
David is going to jump into her software and remove those restrictions! Of course he is.
Cue the montage.
David. Computer screens. Code. Serious expressions. Lots of handy computer work accompanied by dramatic orchestrated music.
Initially Sara acts robotic, but don't worry. That pretty much disappears within a few scenes.
She cuts David's hair. Then it's raining. Sara desperately wants to experience the rain. She assures David she is waterproof. Of course she is!
Fuck me.
Oh wait! Now they're both soaking wet! Well, obviously those wet clothes have to come off. The dialogue descends into trite bullshit and, naturally, David and Sara have sex.
Seriously, there is still an hour left and I already want to leave.
Next comes the obligatory scene where the robot watches television and learns how humans behave through commercials and reality TV. Because apparently reality TV is where one goes to learn normal human behavior.
Sara ventures out on her own while David is at work. She encounters a male jerk off, and David's female neighbor, who has a baby, comes to Sara's rescue.
Wait. Will Sara want a baby now? File that thought away.
The jerk Sara encountered earlier later attacks her while she is walking through an empty alley. She retaliates, injures him in the family jewels, and he appears to be dead.
Wow!
M3GAN all grow'd up!
Sara tells David she wants to go out. Guess where they go? A bar! And guess what's happening?
KARAOKE!
Sara gets onstage and performs a full rendition of Love Me Love Me, suddenly sounding like a major recording artist.
Vomit.
More sex after the singing. Then Sara gives some guy a compound fracture after catching him filming her and David having sex.
At this point, predictability has taken over and the dialogue has devolved into cookie cutter garbage. It's becoming increasingly understandable why the studio delayed releasing this thing and ultimately dumped it directly onto streaming.
Did I mention the musical score is terrible?
Meanwhile, David has dinner with an attractive female coworker. Gee, I wonder where this is going? Eventually…
The next night, David's female coworker unexpectedly shows up at his place. David still hasn't bothered to mention that he is beta testing a life size female robot.
Oh, pray tell, what could possibly happen next?
Yup.
David is having sex with his coworker when Sara is discovered. Sara comes out of power save mode and attacks both of them. David desperately tries to shut Sara down.
Sara responds:
You can't turn me off, David!
Holy shit, Batman! Yes, that turn me off line is really a line in the movie!
David finally calls the company and tells them to come get Sara because, you know, their billion-dollar robot is clearly fucking dangerous. And then Soulm8te goes completely off the rails.
Sara becomes sexually involved with just about everyone. At one point she has sex with the same unprofessional tech who originally delivered her. She kills him during sex by crushing his penis.
Gross.
Bloody.
Vile.
Then she puts the dead tech in the bathtub and proceeds to dismember him with an electric carving knife. You know, the kind you use for Thanksgiving turkey. Good luck cutting through bone with that! But we must suspend disbelief.
As the plot and overall story spiral further into stupidity, Sara kidnaps the neighbor's baby. Remember that baby? Now Sara can show David what a fantastic synthetic mommy she can be! Sara takes off with the kid and officially goes on the rampage.
The CEO arrives and wants to help the police capture Sara.
Chaos ensues. Sara pauses to kill the CEO by crushing him with his own smart car! Sara is going to kill David's coworker. The baby is saved. David and Sara have the inevitable epic fight. And then Sara delivers this profound declaration: I exist in the ether.
Oh boy.
Eventually David's coworker sends Sara flying off a cliff and into the freezing ocean below. She must be dead! Right? Cut to one year later.
David is doing great. His coworker is doing great. Everything is wonderful.
Or is it? Uh oh.
At a fancy dinner, a businessman introduces David to his companion.
Guess who?
It's Sara! Except now she's a brunette.
END SCENE.
END MOVIE.
And let's not forget how adorable it is that they spelled Soulmate with an 8. Comically profound right to the bitter end.
Thank the robot gods this movie is over. Soulm8te left me feeling Soull3ss.
Psycho Scale: 3 out of 10.
FROM THE VAULT (1930s–1980s)
Rope - 1948 Rated PG – runtime 1h 20m
Alfred Hitchcock’s Rope remains one of his most fascinating technical achievements. Set almost entirely inside a Manhattan apartment, the film was shot to unfold in nearly real time. Its runtime is just 80 minutes, while roughly 100 minutes pass within the story itself.
Even more remarkable is how Hitchcock created the illusion that the entire movie was filmed in one continuous shot. Working within the limitations of film reels at the time, he used extraordinarily long takes, carefully choreographed camera movements, hidden cuts, and clever editing tricks to seamlessly connect one shot to the next.
The result is deliberately claustrophobic. The camera rarely gives you a chance to escape the room or the tension. Released in 1948, Rope was an audacious filmmaking experiment that still feels inventive nearly eight decades later. No car chases. No gore. No over the top scenery. Just acting!
It’s not simply a Hitchcock classic. It’s a masterpiece.
VHS CORNER (Available only on videotape)
The Kindred 1987 Rated R – runtime 1h 32m
The Kindredis pure ’80s horror madness, mad science, grotesque mutations, buckets of slime, and glorious practical effects from an era when monsters were actually standing in front of the camera. It’s weird, nasty, sometimes ridiculous, and exactly the kind of movie that made wandering the horror aisle of the mom-and-pop video store so much fun.
This one hits the nostalgia button hard for me. I used to have The Kindred poster hanging in a guest room, and that wonderfully creepy artwork still takes me right back. There was something special about the VHS era, when a killer poster or box cover could make you rent a movie without knowing a damn thing about it. The Kindred is a little unhinged, but that’s part of its charm. They just don’t grow monsters like this anymore.
MUSIC (That collides with film)
Halloween II 2009
Whatever you think of Rob Zombie’s Halloween II, one thing is unmistakable: the music is pure Rob Zombie.
Zombie’s influence is all over the soundtrack. Classic rock, punk, metal and strange slices of Americana mix with Tyler Bates’ score, creating something less like a traditional horror soundtrack and more like a mixtape pulled from Zombie’s personal record collection.
For those of us who grew up in the 1970s, much of it is the soundtrack of our lives. The Moody Blues, 10cc, Foghat, MC5, Motörhead and Lynyrd Skynyrd. Music once blasting from AM/FM radios, 8 tracks and turntables now play against the brutal world of Michael Myers.
That contrast is what makes it work. Familiar songs become strange, melancholy and sometimes disturbing when Zombie puts them against horror. Nights in White Satin may never sound quite the same again! Never reaching the end!
Songs heard in the film include:
Nights in White Satin • The Moody Blues
The Things We Do for Love • 10cc
I Just Want to Make Love to You • Foghat
Kick Out the Jams • MC5
The Chase Is Better Than the Catch • Motörhead
What’s Your Name? • Lynyrd Skynyrd
Jackie Blue • Ozark Mountain Daredevils
Am I Evil • Diamond Head
Love Hurts • Nan Vernon
Psycho Studio’s Spotlight
Peter Cushing
For me, Peter Cushing didn’t simply star in Hammer Horror movies. He WAS Hammer Horror.
As a young teen, going to see those films had a sense of wonderment that is difficult to explain today. They were dark, colorful, gothic and just dangerous enough to feel like you were seeing something you probably shouldn’t. And more often than not, Peter Cushing was there waiting for you. Universal who?
Whether he was Baron Frankenstein, Dr. Van Helsing or one of the countless doctors, scientists and determined men confronting the impossible, Cushing brought an intelligence and seriousness to Hammer’s wonderfully lurid world. He never played down to the material. No matter how fantastic the story became, he made you believe it. Incredible!
Christopher Lee may have been Hammer’s magnificent monster, but Cushing was its heartbeat. That thin frame, piercing eyes, unmistakable voice and absolute conviction made him unlike anyone else on the screen.
Decades later, when I think about Hammer Films and the excitement I felt walking into those theaters as a kid, one face comes immediately to mind.
Peter Cushing.
For this young horror fan, he wasn’t just in Hammer Horror.
He was Hammer Horror.
Psycho Studio’s Random Review!
The Shards 2026. Rated TV MA. Season One - 9 Episodes
Based on Bret Easton Ellis’ novel, The Shards came out of the gate showing real promise. The first two episodes had a younger American Psycho feel: dark, stylish, sexually charged, unsettling, and just self-aware enough to make you wonder where the hell it was going.
Those first two episodes were as good as it got.
Ellis oversaw and co-wrote the opening two episodes, and his absence afterward is painfully obvious. What began as a sharp, disturbing descent into privileged Los Angeles youth quickly deteriorated into something increasingly ridiculous. The tension disappeared. The characters became caricatures. What once felt dangerous became predictable, trite, and eventually almost laughable. The technical side suffers as well. At one point the narration (which is a cool touch) speaks to an automobile, a Trans Am when it is clearly a Camaro Z28!
By the time the series finds its supposed groove, The Shards has become virtually unwatchable. It’s particularly frustrating because those opening episodes suggested there was a very good, very twisted series hiding in here somewhere.
The first two episodes: highly recommended.
Everything after: abandon hope. Yikes. This series has sharded the bed!
CLOSING THOUGHT
We refrain from speaking to politics, religion and the strife across the globe. Film has been an incredible connection and enthusiastic distraction, hobby and life pursuit. 2026 is Psycho Studio’s year, and we look forward to sharing thoughts, experiences and the like. We will start sharing some interesting details about this journey in chapter 38 of The Sprinkler. We wish everyone a safe and happy end of summer.
Mykal and I shared this credo with one another a couple years ago; it was poignant then & surely is today!
Be cool to one another
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Mykal and I wish everyone a positive month! Be safe and stay psycho! We would love to hear from our audience. Comments, feedback and suggestions are welcome!
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Mike & Mykal - Psycho Studios Phoenix – 9.1.2026
Thank you, Psychos! Chapter 37
